install theme

“The master in the art of living makes little distinction between her work and her play, her labor and her leisure, her mind and her body, her information and her recreation, her love and her religion. She hardly knows which is which. She simply pursues her vision of excellence at whatever she does, leaving others to decide whether she is working or playing. To her she’s always doing both.”

- James A. Michener (slightly modified by Andi Hawley)
Poolside - Slow Down
  • Artist: Poolside
  • Song: Slow Down
  • Album: Pacific Standard Time
  • 39

Today I rode down to the Lakefront path here in Chicago for a meeting at one of the Harbors. (A meeting, right? Sounds vague and mysterious, like a date, or a drug deal? Nope, just a meeting about a future event thingy… on the lake.) As soon as I hit the pavement after exiting my therapist’s gently cooled apartment, I became aware of just what summer can really feel like. With humidity today it “feels like” 91°. So, I cruised gently, without pushing too hard, and when I turned onto the lakefront path and coasted up the harbor, I remembered the swimsuit I didn’t put on under my clothes this morning and was filled with regret.

How I’d love to take the plunge and swim in the still cool waters. Tomorrow morning perhaps… before the sun is high. Till then, I’ll slow down.


I prefer to be hungry and lean
in a state of satisfied emptiness.
I crave a little, but he said, “you like to miss things.”
So I miss you, the way I miss food.

When the dish is served, I gorge myself
Unafraid of growing too full
too fat
because there’s room to spare.

Sad Brad Smith - Love is Not What You Need
  • Artist: Sad Brad Smith
  • Song: Love is Not What You Need
  • 49

Sad Brad Smith is a Chicago artist who I think I must have seen around the neighborhood a fair bit. There’s this one guy who I always see on Milwaukee Ave. He walks by and I and experience this glimmer of memory of his face (which for me, is a common occurrence, as someone with a mild form of prosopagnosia). Looking at the picture on his website, I squint and frown and think to myself, “Yeah, I think that’s him.” But we’ve never met, so I can’t be sure.

It’s sort of like that with false love… a love you haven’t truly met. I’ve felt it so many times and in so many different ways, I sometimes find myself squinting and thinking, “Is that it? Yeah, I think that’s it. It kind of seems like it.”

Except when you feel love in that unmistakeable way, like recognizing someone from long ago, in a crowd. Instinctively you call out their name and they turn and recognize you too. You move toward each other to re-connect. Inside, I’m screaming, “I LOVE YOU!”

Love is not what you need, it’s how you feel.

Alluring and ethereal… Bat For Lashes is a new discovery for me. I hear shades of Kate Bush both in the vocals and the synths+strings. I’m posting the video, because the dancing made it so I couldn’t stop watching.

Kate Bush says she dances as much as she can. I get the impression Natasha Khan does too.

Broadcast 2000 - Get Up And Go
  • Artist: Broadcast 2000
  • Song: Get Up And Go
  • Album: Building Blocks
  • 49

Hypnotic vocals, tinkly guitars, soothing violins. I just keep hitting “play.”

Bear Hands - Giants
  • Artist: Bear Hands
  • Song: Giants
  • Album: Giants - Single
  • 51

It creeps up on you with subtle beats, building till you hear the rap-like-rhymes through a blown-out microphone, and then a crescendo into a poppy plateau of perfect summer riffs and beats and then comes the chorus, “I am loving you more,” a surefire certain anthem to fearless feeling. Another ascent up an energetic ladder of lyrics and then coasting out into a spacious hands-free flight down a twisty turning trail of pronouncements and promises. You take your hands off the brakes, feet off the pedals, and feel the air flowing through you as you look out to the fields of grass on your right the sea on your left, distant waves crashing on rocks, the pavement smoothly slipping by, you’re delighting in your own human-powered, mountain/gravity-assisted velocity.

That’s what love is like sometimes: climbing a mountain for an hour so you can delight in the exhiliaration of flying down the other side. That’s what this song is.

Who heard
What, no, right from the start
Go sell that shit somewhere farther from the heart
Running and running and running and stop
Come on we both knew this thing would be hard
I see art, you see class
You think, you ask
You say “Darling am I a chore?”

I said I know you love me, I am loving you more
I am loving you more
I am loving you more
I am loving you more

Ducktails - Letter of Intent
  • Artist: Ducktails
  • Song: Letter of Intent
  • Album: Spring (Or The Love In Between) Vol. 3
  • 53

Breathless vocals, spoken as if between kisses. A string of electronic notes spinning off into the future. It’s refreshing when people make their intentions clear.

Follow you, you follow me
To the top and then we’ll see
Swing with you, you swing with me
‘Til our heart’s content
Follow you, you follow me
To the top and then we’ll see
Swing with you, you swing with me
Letter of intent